Just call me Crusher.

I am not new to embarrassing moments, as some of you learned with the #recycling #crusher incident, where I danced/stepped backwards and fell slow motion into a bucket of empty cans. For anyone who was lucky enough to witness, it was epic. It was hilarious. Even the tiny half circle tall boy bruises on my butt were funny. For those lucky friends, and for anyone who just needs a laugh today, here is the most recent event in the clumsy life of Lauren.

Before I start, I will refer to a classic piece of advice that some say. This advice is that life isn't about the destination, but the journey...

Well... When you find yourself on your hands and knees on a dirty streetcar floor (minds out of the gutter please) it becomes less about the journey and more about the embarrassing place you ended up.

Enter hilarious, clumsy, dignity-losing Lauren.

Walking onto the streetcar was a breeze. I can even say my balance is improving when the streetcar starts moving before I reach the safety of a seat. No, this is not where shit (I) went down.

Fast-forward at least ten, confident steps in my almost-flat thong sandals carrying a large umbrella. Confident moments are always when embarrassing stuff happens. It's a rule.

So here I am walking, hips swinging, feet thudding to maintain balance, when my left ankle decides to take a little roll to the side. Ouch. 

Off balance I go, but I caught myself. 

Honestly, I did... Briefly. 

Then the streetcar started to brake to come to a full stop. So much for balance. I lurched forward, slow-motion forward running style until my body could no longer hold me up right. I landed on my hands and knees with my nose centimetres from the disgusting TTC floor.

One man, kindly asked if I was okay, and offered to help me up. This was embarrassing, but I was thankful of his kindness.  I wanted to cry at the time. Dignity gone. Face Red.

Another man clearly saw. How could you not???  He ignored everything and pretended like it never happened. I hope he laughed to himself all night. Humour is the only good thing to come from such humiliating moments.

The part I do not understand is the umbrella. If I had of dropped the damn thing, I could have saved myself easily. But no. My hand had to grip that thing like it was a newborn baby I was protecting. Ridiculous.

Bahahahaha when I got to my seat, and the redness faded, I started laughing to myself and did not stop until I reached my stop 45 minutes later. It was so funny, so awkward, and a fall I will never forget, much like my epic recycling fail, the time I slipped and fell under Lisa's car, or when I fell at Jenna's grade eight graduation. See, it happens often, and every time, it is hilarious.

In the spirit of my also sometimes clumsy sister, I drew a paint diagram for some visuals. I am not great with paint, but hopefully it's amusing, if nothing else. Check it out below, and laugh and laugh and laugh. Laughter is the best medicine, you know.